I was round at my Dads today and he nearly had an embelism in front of the TV. I mean, I’m not exaggerrating here – his cheeks went red – his forehead began to pulsate. I almost reached for my mobile phone, frantically trying to remember what to do if a mad elderly man collaspes in front of you. That was until he began to yell:

“Get that f****g man off my screen….”

Yes – his reaction was all because the little fat Go Compare man had suddenly popped up on screen. Sadly for my dad, my daughter loves him and started to sing at the top of her voice.

“Go compare, Go compare!”

My Dad had to stagger out of the room to escape, or be sick, or kill someone – or perhaps all three. I could still hear him muttering his curses in the outside toliet.

” Go compare! Go f******g compare. I know just where I like to stick his false f******g moustace. Right up his flabby a**e. Then see if he’d like to go compare that….”

It’s not only that poor man that falls foul. It’s Cash for Gold – “Dale Winton, son – you’ve not just let me down, you’ve let yourself down” and generally any advert that contains singing (i.e. We Buy Any Bra.com…..or whatever!)

Things get thrown at the TV, expletives get yelled – it’s a danger zone.

I can’t even look at the Touch and Fresh advert now. This is after my Dad remarked that the bloke in it should be “sectioned for getting excited over a bloody air freshner” and that he was disturbed by the fact that the device itself “looked like lady bits”…

Worryingly, he has a point.

Now we try and make him watch BBC as much as possible, for the sanity of us all…..