Tag Archives: buggies

I Hate Buses – Part 3

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Oh no surely not another bad experience? Doesn’t the girl ever learn you might think…..And you’d probably be right.

Trouble is, it was a really hot afternoon, I had a whining little girl dragging on my arm and huge bags of shopping – what bloody choice did I have. Yes, I could have walked, but I would have looked like a sweaty sumo wrestler by the end of it, with arms dangling down by my ankles – never an appealing look at any time of the day.

So the bus it was.

The start was promising as it was pretty empty, although the driver was fairly surly and barely raised a smile, as he thrust my change at me.

I pushed the buggy into the all-too small space and plopped myself down in a nearby seat with my relieved daughter (she has declared she hates the sun and only likes the rain, bodes well for our summer holiday abroad)

But then another buggy struggled on and wedged beside mine. This buggy was a huge designer type thing, all singing and dancing but so bloody obstructive. I swear to god expensive buggies are not made for public transport – only to be gently pushed along posh city streets,

I sat there staring at these two prams, now looking like one merged beast and knew with a sinking heart there was going to be a problem when one of us got off,

And of course the first one to ding the bell was me. I went to move my buggy and of course the wheels locked with its new best friend. It took a huge tug from me to pull mine free.

Because of this my handbag fell to the floor releasing a load of cheesy puffs that I had in there in a handy (but not very secure) Tupperware pot (to keep the kids happy). The bloody things went everywhere – how did so many fit in such a little tub? And I couldn’t leave them could I? I couldn’t be such an obvious litter bug…

So there I am, on the dirty bus floor gathering up my puffs, feeling the glares of the passengers around me as I delayed their bus further.

Even worse I then released that by bending over, my skinny jeans was exposing rather too much of my not so lovely bottom cleavage to an elderly gentleman seated opposite me

“Best view I’ve had in ages love…” he declared as I scampered off

Seriously, am I cursed on these wretched things or what?

Bum Cracks by candiceecidnac

Bum Cracks, a photo by candiceecidnac on Flickr.

Pram Rage! The New Evil on our Streets?

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I have been reading about this new phenomenon of buggy rage which has hit our great nation. I mean Jesus, what has happened to our society where over 40 percent of mums have experienced an attack of some description while pushing buggies, mainly by OAPS and women (source NetMums)

Is there some kind of hate campaign being drawn up in the WI meetings or coffee meetings at the local church groups, where little grey haired folk decide they must seek revenge on anyone pushing a small, squealing body around. Did they not have children in the OLD DAYS? Or did they just never take their children out and never inflict the general public to the monstrosities that were prams in those days (those wheels could have had someone’s foot off).

I’ve had people cut me up on the pavement and then glare if I accidently catch their ankle (what the hell did they expect?). I have had other buggies shove me off the path. I have also witnessed “bus rage” where rows have developed over the lack of space in the b****y things (hmmm I can see “I hate buses Part 3″ developing). But luckily, so far, I have never been beaten up or screamed at for simply pushing my baby in the street.

I must admit, I do look forward to the day when my son’s chubby little legs are strong enough to carry him around most places and I can leave the pram behind – as I find the whole thing a damn nuisance and living in a place surrounded by hills I can feel my back crumbling by the second.

I also hate the “mum envy” that develops, as each woman looks over each other’s metal contraptions and makes an immediate comparison:

“Oh I was going to have that one – but I find this one so much more compact.” Or “that was our pram number two – we are actually on pram number 5 now!”

It seems these days the more you spend on a pram the better it is and the better your “cred” on the street. My cred can’t be worth much as I brought my prams on Ebay…

As for the rage that seems to be developing towards us pram pushers – I can only remain somewhat bemused. I just hope that when I’m old and wrinkled and wearing sensible shoes – I will remember what it was like to struggle along with a screaming baby in pram and will remain freindly and helpful at all times.

Alterantively if I am an evil old crone I hope I have dementia so I don’t know about it, otherwise I would turn in my own lonely grave..