It’s amazing the conversations that you hear on buses. Honestly, I’m tempted to stay on one all day long. I’d probably get my novel completed in no time. Maybe it’s unfortunate that I don’t use them more often, but I don’t for two reasons:

1) They are expensive
2) I hate buses (see earlier posts)

I was forced to travel today due to my stupid high-heeled shoes that were NOT designed to be walked in and a three- inch blister that threatened to weep any second (as did I!)…

Today, two women clambered on the bus after me. They looked normal enough. One was middle aged, with glasses and a long sour face. The other was younger, with plump features and a nice jolly face. They squeezed into the seat behind and started nattering at a rate that almost defied logic. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I can talk fast. But these two seemed to have no requirement to breathe.

I didn’t mean to eavesdrop on their conversation, but you do, don’t you? It’s human nature. Like if you see someone fall over on their arse, you have to fight the instinct not to laugh.

The conversation went like this. This is a true account. I can only assume that they both worked in the same shop.

“Poor Linda has to do all the deliveries now and she’s the manager. I mean, a manager shouldn’t have to clamber up and down the stairs in a sweat. It’s not right…”
“I know. But Angie can’t do it. She’s 65. She has a heart attack every time she goes up the stairs.”
Every time? Shit, she must be keeping the cardiac wards busy…
“But I can’t do deliveries with my chest…”
Maybe you should try using you arms then….
“I know. But you know that if I lift anything, my eyeballs could pop out…”

Yes. That is honestly what they said. I dread to think what the shop is like. It sounds like a set of a horror movie.
Even worse, I was sucking a spherical boiled mint at the time. It kind of felt wrong in my mouth after that…
I regretted getting off at my stop as I couldn’t find out more. I also can’t stop thinking about poor old Linda, trying to manage with those two!